How to Nurture Self-Regulation and Emotional Development Through Montessori

Montessori is a way of teaching that focuses on kids being independent, having some rules, and treating them in a way that’s good for their minds, bodies, and relationships. This approach to education can also be used to nurture self-regulation and emotional development in children. Here are some ways you can use Montessori principles to help your child develop these important skills.

Helping Your Child Emotional Through Montessori

1. Provide a Predictable Routine

Montessori is all about creating a structured environment for children to learn. Establishing a predictable routine gives them a sense of security and helps them understand what is expected of them. Having a routine can be very helpful for children who have difficulty controlling their behavior, as it can make them feel more able to manage their actions.

2. Allow for Uninterrupted Work Cycles

Montessori encourages children to work at their own pace and to work on activities that interest them. Allowing them to work without interruption allows them to focus on their task and encourages self-regulation. This can be difficult in a busy household, but it’s important to try to create an environment that allows for uninterrupted work cycles.

3. Foster Personal Responsibility

It’s important for children to learn how to be responsible. This means they should take ownership of their actions and help keep their environment healthy. For instance, they can be asked to clean up their work areas or take care of their belongings. By taking responsibility for their actions, children are better equipped to regulate their behavior and develop a sense of independence.

Furthermore, this sense of responsibility can extend beyond the classroom and into their personal and social lives, as they learn to take ownership of their choices and actions in all aspects of their lives.

4. Encourage Choice and Autonomy

Montessori promotes freedom of choice and self-initiated learning. Encouraging children to make their own decisions fosters self-regulation and autonomy. You can make it easy by letting your child choose what they want to do or wear for the day.

5. Model Self-Regulation

Children learn by observation. Modeling self-regulation and emotional regulation by speaking calmly and reflecting before responding can help children to understand appropriate behavior. This can be difficult at times, but taking a moment to pause before reacting can help model self-regulation for your child. Here are a few ways to self-regulate:

  • Take deep breaths
  • Count to 10 before reacting
  • Take a break from the situation
  • Use positive self-talk
  • Engage in physical activity or exercise

6. Focus on Process, Not Outcome

Montessori encourages children to learn through the process, and not focus on the outcome. This can be a difficult concept for many parents to grasp, as we often place a lot of emphasis on achievement. However, focusing on the process can help children develop self-regulation and a love of learning.

For example, when your child is drawing a picture, instead of focusing on the finished product, you can talk to them about the different colors and shapes they are using. When they are building with blocks, you can encourage them to explore different ways of building and experimenting with balance and structure. When your child reads, you can ask them questions about the story and help them relate the characters to their own lives.


It’s important to remember that nurturing self-regulation and emotional development in children is not an easy task. It takes time, patience, and a lot of trial and error. As a parent, you may find yourself struggling to maintain a predictable routine or model appropriate behavior for your child.

But it’s important to keep trying, and to remember that every effort you make to foster these skills is valuable. By using Montessori principles, you can help your child develop self-regulation and emotional development skills that will benefit them throughout their lives.

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